My daughter Amadi has declared that she wishes to become a professional soccer player. I'm not sure if I should have dissuaded her and instead lobbied for a more predictable, profitable professional. I'm guessing that there are some parents out there who would have done just that. But I chose another path.
I encouraged her decision. I know that she will probably change her career choice at least twenty times before she actually has to choose a major. So there are some who may say that I was right to indulge her because it won't stick. But even if it does stick, I will still encourage her.
I want my daughter to follow her passion. I want her to wake up every morning excited about going to work. I don't want her to be 33 years old and still trying to figure out what she wants to do with the rest of her life. My only stipulation is that she gets a degree in something.
Being a professional soccer player isn't so bad. She'll get an opportunity to see the world and be in great physical shape.
Before she aspired to be a professional soccer player, Amadi wanted to be a firefighter. I was fine with that as well. My 10 year old is a thrill seeker with a heart of gold. Her favorite pastime, aside from soccer, is doing back flips off of the sofa in the family room. She also loves to do things will little people and seniors. She wants to have an adrenaline rush and help people. I was great with that. So I started researching degrees in Fire Science.
Now that she wants to be the future Abby Wambach, I can research sports related degrees. I want her to pursue her passion but I believe that it's important for her to have a back-up plan related to that passion. So even if the professional soccer thing doesn't pan out she can coach soccer and be a Physical Education teacher or even a trainer.
Being 33 and at a career crossroads has helped me to approach Amadi's rearing a little different. I don't want her to be like me. I don't want her trying to still figure out things years after obtaining her undergraduate degree.
At an early age I had a passion for politics. My earliest memory of participating in the democratic process is the Bush-Dukakis presidential race in 1988. I remember telling my mother that I didn't know why she was voting for Dukakis because he wasn't going to win. It seems I had followed all of the polling and news coverage on the race. That Election Night, I stayed up late to watch the returns. Of course George Bush was the victor.
From then on, my mother would take me to vote with her. She would take me into the polling booth and I would pull the levers for her. This was after I advised her on the candidates and their platforms. I never missed an Election Day. I was jubilant when I turned 18 and was able to vote on my own.
Until this day, I still get calls from family members asking for voting advice. They know that I keep up with the issues and I thoroughly research platforms.
So why did I major in English? Why didn't I major in Political Science? Simply put, my mother didn't know how to channel my passion into a career. She had no idea that I could have been a Congressional Staffer, a political writer, a policy researcher etc. etc. Unfortunately, I came of age in the pre-internet era so it wasn't as simple as performing a Google search.
My mother is the daughter of sharecroppers so in her defense, she had no idea how to encourage my vocational pursuits. She only knew that it was immensely important for me to go to college. I did that and went on to obtain a Master's degree in City and Regional Planning. Somewhat political but not quite.
By the time I pursued my Master's I was already working in my second career as a government employee. I taught English for three years and after burning out quickly, I took a random job with the government. While working for the government I wanted to get a Master's in something related. Public Administration didn't appeal to me so I chose Urban Planning. While in planning school, Katrina happened and I found a new passion. I decided that I wanted to devote my life to helping people rebuild their communities after disasters. I was so touched by the devastation and calamity of Katrina that I wanted to do something worthwhile.
Although I loved urban planning, I couldn't afford to take a pay cut as I was a single parent and already making good money. Pursuing my new found passion, a job in disaster planning, would have required me to take a $20,000 pay cut. That was a jump that I could not make. So I decided to remain in the government and settle for something close. My job as a facilities planner for the military is the closest that I will probably get until my daughter gets old enough for me to not have to focus so much on money (whenever that is).
Once again, I didn't follow a passion. This time I knowingly walked away from a career because of financial reasons. The first time was due to a lack of information and guidance.
If I had to live my life again with the wisdom that I have now, I would have pursued a career in politics. If I would have done this right out of college, I would have been able to start at the entry level. Any money made after scrapping by during four years of college would have been a boon. I would have been able to satisfy my writing jones by penning articles and editorials.
But I can't go back in time (at least not yet). I cannot relive my life. But I can use the knowledge that I have gleaned to assist my daughter and others in making career choices. I don't want my daughter to be complacent at work like I've become. I want her to have a career and not a job. I want her to be fulfilled.
So even if she decided that she wants to be a scuba diving instructor, or a cupcake baker or yes, even a basket weaver, I will support her decision and do everything in my power to ensure that she is informed about her career choice and educational options. Her career choice will not grow out of a lack of information or compensation but it will grow out of her true passion.
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